I'm okay, really. I just need to bitch, oh and how.

Well, we made it through the first year and on December 13 my babies turned 1!! So I have been told it gets easier-hah. Where are the people who told me this and what were they smoking (maybe I should try some)?Now my little monkeys are mobile, opinionated, and in need of constant entertainment. There's a lot of screaming/crying. Them, not me (mostly). At this "easier" stage, they still can't verbalize what they want or feel and let me tell you, Gabriella will peel the paint off the neighbors walls with her shrill, ear-piercing attempts to "communicate". I keep telling my husband that I should start liquid therapy but he always calls my bluff cause after about three sips of chardonnay I'm ready for bed.

****pause in typing so that I can pry childs new front teeth out of my leg (screaming, mine)****

I am madly in love with my little screamers, I just don't think I am mentally equipped to deal with the challenges I am facing. For example, the frequent scream fest. Did I mention I can't handle the screaming/crying?

****pause to attempt pickup of two screaming children-one seems to have fallen, the other is pissed I removed my magazine from his little claws****

After a mini(!) nervous breakdown about 2 months ago (what day is it?) my magic pill doc suggested I might "get some support". Well l I tried. While still in the delusional glow of early (very early, the glow part disappeared quickfast) pregancy I researched and joined a local twins group. Unfortunately, when it was time to reap the rewards of my yearly membership fee I was unable to join the damn yahoo group for still unknown reasons and recieved invites to childless(!!!) EVENING events. Okay. So I am still angry. I don't have a nanny, close relatives on a regular basis, or the dough for babycare times 2. Furthermore, I am not awake in the "evening"-I am trying to get some damn sleep. So the twins group thing didn't work out.